Mindset

This time, I changed my mindset when being on call. Usually, I’d always aim to finish my work early and get some sleep. This tactic worked while I was in other postings, not in obstetrics. It is just impossible to sleep, be it on call in PAC, labour room or the ward… there’s always things to do. Actually, when you are on call, you are not encouraged to sleep, you are being paid for staying up. But what can you do,  when you have to work the next day, and you are expected to work like a normal person who had the night to sleep! I wished that whoever is on call in labour room or PAC can get the day off the next day… but I know it wont happen, not even in my dreams!

The sight of PAC that everyone dreams of... empty!

After countless complaints to whoever I meet, I came up with a conclusion of just accepting the fact. No matter how many times I whine about it, nothing will change. I talked to my husband, and he gave a good tip, he told me to read Yassin everyday and insyallah, Allah will give me the strength during my night calls and things will go smoothly. I also changed my mindset, instead of thinking when I get to sleep, I just think about learning as much. I also put the thought of wanting to sleep aside so that I can concentrate fully on working. Hence, my on call last Tuesday night was a blast! I had 2 dedicated medical students tagging with me, so I we got to discuss gestational diabetes and I gave them tips on how to present cases.

The flow of patients in PAC is a lot better, I mean, no more patients who come non-stop. I wonder why… I guess the words of Serdang being fully booked has spread around, so patient choose other nearby hospitals. I also don’t know why patients from Banting, Semenyih, Gombak and many far away places still go to Serdang, there are lots of other hospitals.

I always pray hard that when I am on call, there are no bad CTGs that show fetal distress. I hate it when housemans get blamed for fetal distress, believe, it’s a sad scene, I just feel so sorry for my friend. I know he or she had worked really hard and yet they are not being appreciated. It’s a fact of being a houseman, the lowest form of existence in the hospital, hehe.

During times when I feel pissed that I don’t get to sleep, I look at my surroundings. I see other hospital staffs staying awake, especially the Radicare cleaners, may Allah bless them always. They have to continuously clean the labour room and even worse, they are not being treated with respect… with the low pay at the end of the month, nothing compared to us!  I get emotional thinking what kind of life they live in, and at the same time, it makes me feel grateful with my life. That’s why it’s important to look at the people below you.

Ok… I better get some sleep and rest for tomorrow. Luckily I am not on call this weekend!